Are you grounded?
What does that even mean?
I visualize grounding as the moment when dirt and plants connect to create the environment needed for something to grow.
When I recently wrote about the distress I was seeing in my coaching clients, I didn’t know if my readers would relate. I was curious enough to send out a survey in my newsletter and LinkedIn asking folks to tell me how they were REALLY doing.
Here’s what y’all said:
Only 14% of the folx who took my survey had a smiling emoji. Everyone else ranged from 😐 to 😩.
I mean, I wasn’t shocked but then again I was.
Let me speak in I statements. I can say that MY life has totally gone off the rails since then. My fatigue meter went waaaay up and my capacity to take action went way down. Add in my perimenopausal symptoms and it’s a wrap.
My clients too.
What about you?
At What Cost?
Recently I started asking ‘at what cost’ anytime a client starts talking about being over-committed/burned out/exhausted. I get curious about how they gauge their capacity as leaders.
How did you get to an eight-day work week?
What will happen if you don’t respond to emails during your vacation?
What are you willing to drop to say yes to that new committee role?
I hold the coaching space for clients to explore. No judgment. No shame. Just a lot of openness for folks to slow down their pace long enough to self-determine what they want for themselves and their leadership. I like to ask questions that are not about the client’s calendar and or strategic plan.
What do you want?
What are you willing to let go to have it?
If having it all is not an option, what will you choose to pursue?
These are not thinking only questions. They are feeling, touching, and listening to questions, too.
Right now many of us are in cerebral land. Thoughts swirling around. Replaying conversations. Retraumaziting ourselves as we think about all the things that can and have gone wrong.
Turning off the loop is possible.
What if we collectively commit to stop the spinning and get grounded again?
Ways to Get Started
Here are some things I’ll be doing over the next 30 days. (Maybe something on this list will call you to it. 🤔)
- Daily walks on my Peloton.
- Drink more water.
- Realign my calendar to my goals.
- Re-engage with tools in my toolkit (Therapy, Tapping, Music, etc.).
- Time outdoors (alone and with humans).
Full disclosure: Nothing on this list is new to me. I know that doing the things on this list will help me. Unfortunately, when in distress, rooting down to be present with and for MYSELF is the last thing on my mind. Instead, I flail around fighting, fleeing, and forgetting that I already have the resources I need to realign. Our human nature is strange that way. That’s why collective actions work. They create the energy needed for transformation to occur.
We can do this together, y’all. We certainly can’t do it alone.
Share 1 or 2 commitments you will make to help get yourself grounded again.
I don’t even know what realigning my calendar towards my goals intentionally looks like. I just know it have things that I want to accomplish, and tasks to accomplish them, so my calendar is always full. Yet, I don’t feel like I’m making progress as I’d like to. Go figure. So, I’m going to figure out what actually aligning my calendar to my goals is and do that. I’m also seeking a new therapist.