Martha, in Paris this past fall. Me, rocking my classic hella black t-shirt
This year, we took our cue from some of my recent work focused on rest.
TEN REASONS WHY REST MATTERS [In order of importance] 1. Rest increases purpose 2. Rest makes problems feel more manageable 3. Rest is fun 4. Rest is refreshing 5. Rest feeds the creative juices 6. Rest generates new ideas 7. Rest improves social relationships 8. Rest allows the mind and body to repair 9. Rest is liberation 10. Rest is necessary
TEN WAYS TO REST 1. Read or listen to a book 2. Lay down (sleep not required) 3. Honor your peak sleep times 4. Look out the window 5. Have a creative date with yourself 6. Listen to music 7. Move your body as you are able 8. Sing from your soul 9. Play a game 10. Spend time with someone who will love you up
I hope your new year is off to an easeful start and that it brings more purpose and joy.
Sending love from our house to your house, Kelli and Martha
I was always this way but I was also trained to do it. You may know that I spent a decade working in philanthropy. My job was to make recommendations about who should receive funding based on alignment with our foundation’s priorities and demonstrated impact. However, long before I worked as a grantmaker, I was a philanthropist.
My earliest memory of giving was in church. Then it was volunteering. And finally, once I was in college it was making a donation to a university campaign in support of the Crusade for Black Children with the Children’s Defense Fund. Giving is one way I demonstrated my leadership. Many Black folks I know do not consider themselves to be a philanthropist. For some reason, the term ‘philanthropy’ has been seemingly earmarked for the wealthy. I disagree. I want us to claim our place in the giving landscape of this country because as much attention as we get on our spending, we get much less shine for our giving.
If you want to amplify your giving profile, here are my top recommendations:
Monitor your giving. If you’re like me, you may have small-dollar donations being automatically deducted from your checking account each month. You also probably donate to someone’s tuition, books, and back-to-school supplies in the fall. Then you donate to the burial fund of friends or family. Oh, and don’t forget about that check you write each year to support your family church.
Categorize your giving. What are the ‘buckets’ that you give to? Faith. Education. Arts. etc. Do these buckets align with the things you care about? Are you satisfied with the way your giving is split between the buckets?
Prioritize your giving. Now that you know where you’re giving. Think about which categories are most important to you and why. This is a good way to understand your giving priorities; the things that motivate you to give. Can you multiply the impact by putting more intentionality behind your giving?
Align your giving. Are you giving to the groups led by people closest to the problems you are hoping to help better? Or, are you defaulting to the organizations that are popular and often whiter, wealthier, and larger? If you look at the leadership of the organizations you give to, are those folks leaders of diverse experience and culture?
Consider your giving. Giving is more than writing a check. As much as causes you care about want your check, they also value your time and professional expertise. A few hours a month of your time could be the difference between an organization staying small and building capacity to generate larger dollars. Let your talent help springboard groups you care about to the next level.
Now that you’ve done an initial analysis, fill out this worksheet I’ve created to help you become a leader who gives.
This post is for the person that has tired of the hustle and bustle of the fast-paced, overachieving, way of leadership. This is for the leader who believes that slowing down allows them to have a deeper impact. The one who wants a more intentional pace instead of the chaotic and disorganized pace of the past.
We live in a get-things-done-now type of society. A world that values efficiency over intentionality. Just because we live in this type of world doesn’t mean we have to surrender to the pace around us all the time. Sometimes we may want or need to slow down.
If slowing down the pace is a leadership goal for you, here are a few places to start.
Be honest with yourself about where you work and how you work best. If you can’t face reality, things will remain hard in areas that could soften. Tell the truth about what you want and what you’re willing to put up with to get it at your current organization.
Include your long-term professional goals in your work plan. Being aligned with your goals will keep you motivated and clear which can contribute to a less frenzied work pace. This also makes sure you’re not putting all your time into making your supervisor look good by saving a little energy/time to grow as a leader.
Schedule regular time off at the beginning of the year. Don’t be the person left to do two jobs because your colleague planned for their leave but you didn’t plan for it too. [read that again] Regular breaks throughout the year prevent burnout and slow down the hectic pace many leaders get trapped in.
Have a 15min staff meeting with yourself at the beginning and end of your week. This is a great place to think about how you will track your task and goal/progress for the week. Managing tasks helps you stay on top of things and also slows your pace enough for you to see what went well and what got away from you. This also helps you set up the upcoming week to be at the pace you desire.
Create buffers between meetings. Buffers give you time to step away from your desk, jot down any notes for meeting follow-up, take bio breaks, nourish your body, etc. The buffers are key to preserving yourself in the work. Burnout serves no one and is avoidable, even when we tell ourselves it isn’t.
Free up some time by aligning committee work to your individual work plan or team plan. A lot of committees are sucking time and not adding value to your goals. Some are political moves that you feel pressured to make, but others could roll off your plate if you made a strategic case for the limited value they bring. Ditch the committees you can and put boundaries around the ones you can’t.
Start having strategy meetings before meetings. Meetings before meetings help you identify key places to be more collaborative, improve processes, and walk through the agenda. Meetings before the meetings provide ample time to review the agenda, prep for any presentation, and jotting down ideas/questions. Setting this time aside is especially helpful for those who need more processing time or feel overhwelmed being asked to respond to discussions on the spot.
Schedule weekly vision & strategy time where your brain has time to percolate on trends, themes, and opportunities. Unlike your weekly staff meeting, this time is not focused on tasks. Tools like Jamboard, Miro, or Mural – or just grab some stickies – and start to categorize and organize your tasks. Where is there overlap? What are you all overlooking in your rush to move quickly? What needs to be delated or postponed?
Don’t co-sign team members engaging in unhealthy work culture. Celebrating problematic ways of working will only make it more difficult for things to change. Even if you can’t openly or safely fight against the pace or volume of work, you don’t have to applaud it. Sometimes our silence says more than our words.
Make an exit plan. If a slower, more intentional work pace is not possible where you are then it’s time to get clear on the type of work environment you want and what it will take to get it.
As you can see, I believe the way to get to more impactful and intentional leadership is to slow down the pace enough to think, startegize, and plan. Want to talk about how coaching can help you get there? Let’s chat!
1. Add a ‘nourishing’ appointment to your online calendar to catch up with friends and colleagues at local (outdoor) spots.
2. Cut your last year’s holiday shopping in half and consider regifting or charitable donations honoring someone instead. Given the great disparities in giving, please support organizations led by people of color, LGBTQ fox, and people with disabilities.
3. Put some love into the world:
For the non-chefs, send an e-gift card for a food delivery service, or, if you can, cook for a friend or loved one in need.
Send a thank you note, email, or text even if it’s too late. Seriously, don’t overthink it. Sending it will benefit you and the other person.
Send the condolence message you forgot to send. Please let’s normalize grief beyond the first two weeks.
Give a stranger a compliment. If you suffer from stranger danger, join the #MakeKindnesstheNorm movement
4. When you don’t get The Thing or Things you want, LET IT GO! Someone else got it instead is happy about it because they got it, and a lot of someones didn’t get it and feel the same way you do.
5. Be an email abolitionist. (Oh Kelli! I will aspire to this!) Go back to phone calls and don’t leave voicemails.
6. Try fried pickles if you haven’t yet. Eat them like people do in the south, by dipping them in some ranch dressing!
7. Hug your loved ones. Or, if you’re not a hugger, make sure to find other ways to show affection—words of affirmation, celebrating their accomplishments, etc.
8. Friends are really important! Our friend group fills our cup daily.
9. Learning to nap is a love letter to your inner child.
10. Celebrate the rejections!! Taking a wrong turn opens the possibility for new discoveries about yourself and others.
